Last night at about 3:30am in her sleep she passed away at the hospital where she’s been suffering since February. 10 months of the most brutal torture. Just no way to live, and there is a sense of relief that she doesn’t have to suffer anymore. 
The timing was so odd. I flew in from London and planned on seeing her. The plan was to see her today, but I didn’t get the chance. My brother, who has been at the hospital literally every single say since February, was not there either. He went on his annual road trip with his buddies to New Jersey to see the Giants game. A part of me feels like she’s been trying so hard to fight to stay alive for us, and this weekend she finally felt like it was OK to go. She was literally THE most unselfish person I’d ever met. She got so much joy out of simply feeding people. I mean that. She loved nothing more than to cook and care for people. This Christmas will be a different one for sure. She usually cooks up a massive feast that all of my friends look forward to. 

Some say she smothered us too much. I don’t give a crap what any of those people think, she smothered us with unconditional love and you can never do that "too much" no matter what these crackpot therapists say. I’m a Momma’s boy and I’m proud of it. Women like her, you just don’t see that often anymore. 
Full of life and laughter, super friendly to any and everyone. All her neighbors loved her. Not just liked her, but I sensed that they loved her for real. I’m so lucky to have been raised by her. So many people, I think, loved her so much because they wished they had a mother like her. I genuinely believe that. I was lucky. 

She loved to dance and laugh. Some of my best memories as a kid were at dinner parties she’d throw at the house. As always, a monster feast, music, lots of wine and drinks… my dad telling jokes that had everyone laughing, then dancing in the living room. 

You know how some people never feel like their parents are proud of them? That was never in question with my mother. She always told me and showed me how proud she was of me without fail. I always felt loved by her and that’s an irreplaceable bond and feeling. She told me she loved me… EVERY day. I mean every… single… day. 

I can honestly say that I don’t know one single person in the whole world that didn’t like her. It was impossible to not like my mother. She could be tough and opinionated for sure, but she was always honest and wasn’t afraid to share her opinion, whether you asked for it or not! Maybe that’s where I got it from…

So I’m in Toronto now. I think the funeral is on Wednesday or Thursday, I’m not quite sure yet. If you knew her, it would be great to see you there. 

I never post pics in my blog, but this pic just sums it up really. This picture was taken in Atlantic City when I won the Borgata event. A happy moment for me, and she’s right there.. as she always was… as proud as ever.