She won’t wake up. She can hear us, I know she can, but she can’t bring herself to wake up. When we showed up at the hospital all the doctors told us there is a major concern. Her vitals are doing ok, but she is in critical condition. Her left arm moves involuntarily from time to time, but she isn’t responding at all to the doctors or to us. The doctors told us that the longer she stays in this condition the worse the prognosis.

The nurse comes to her and says, "Annie, can you squeeze my finger?" If she can do that, they’ll know she’s headed in the right direction… she’s not doing it. She’s not squeezing the finger. She tries to open her eyes when I talk to her, but she can’t seem to open them. She hasn’t moved anything on the ride side of her body at all. Nothing.

She’s on life support, hooked up to a machine with a tube in her throat. She’s getting blood also, and there are just all kinds of random tubes all over the place. I don’t know what they all do.

She won’t wake up. She needs to wake up! The doctor said he’ll do a CAT scan tomorrow to find out what’s happening with her brain. It’s likely that she had another stroke during the surgery. The doctor found a clot in her heart, cut into her heart to remove it, but there were two others also.

The doctor told us the surgery wore him out. Her heart was a complete mess. Whoever put in her pacemaker did an awful job. He said she had a leaky vein, all kinds of clots and other heart damage through the years from taking all kinds of medication. The doctors that worked with her in Toronto seemed to miss everything.

Dr.Dhoushia seems like he really knows what he’s doing. He did warn us that she was high risk, but said without this surgery, she was all but guaranteed to have another stroke. I trust him and think he’s done all he could. The people at the hospital have all seemed to do everything they can for Mommy.

My biggest fear is that she wakes up and can’t speak, or can’t function. That’s probably the worst possible outcome for her and she won’t want to live like that. She needs to keep busy… be her old self again.

The doctors don’t know anything yet. She lays there, with tubes in her mouth and just won’t wake up. They all expected her to be awake a long, long time ago.

There is nothing I can do at this point. My brother and I both left the hospital and are hanging around the house. I’m hitting balls. Any kind of balls. Played about 20 racks of pool against myself, went to the backyard and chipped on my putting green… just keeping busy.

I definitely won’t be making it out to LA for the Heads Up event either, with the main event looking less and less likely by the minute.

She just needs to wake up. Wake up mommy, wake up!

Thanks again to all those that have kept her in their thoughts and prayers. I haven’t had a chance to respond to everyone, but just know that your messages and prayers are appreciated.

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